How To Say "No" When You "Know" You Should

Even with the latest technology, modern conveniences of household appliances, fast modes of transportation and fast food restaurants, there are days when 24 hours just aren't enough. I hope you're not saying to yourself, everyday is that way for you. If this is true, you are in desperate need of this article. You need to be given the "how to" and now!

Dale Carnegie has let it be known there are ways to "Win Friends and Influence People." He's also clued us in on how we can "Stop Worrying and Start Living." If you haven't read either of these books, I highly recommend them. It's been a number of years since I've read either but I have referred back to them numerous times over the years.

You are a busy person. You may be a stay-at-home Mom, or Dad. Perhaps you are a professional or paraprofessional. You could be a white collar or blue collar worker. You may be a student. It doesn't matter. You are very busy. You may be married, single or divorced. You may have children or perhaps not. You are busy with things that are important to you or perhaps more important to someone else. I think you get the picture. It does not matter your gender, marital status, position, title or if you're a parent or not. You are just too busy most of the time because you do not know how to say "no" when asked to do something.

Busy people are always the ones asked to help when something needs to get done. The ones asking you to pitch in are very much aware of this or they would not ask for your help.

I am almost positive you can think of a few people with whom you are acquainted that are usually resting, relaxing and taking it easy when you manage to return their phone call. You often wonder how they do it. You feel you know how to prioritize your "to do" list and could hold time management seminars because of your organizational skills and how much you manage to squeeze into 24 hours.

These people you have consciously decided not to envy or be jealous of have learned the art of "just saying no!" Below are ten scenarios when you should say "no" when asked to do something:

1. If you do not have time to take a minimum of 15 minutes to pray, meditate and read something inspirational each morning or whenever your day begins, you're too busy for sure!
2. If you do not have time to take 15 minutes during your day for a mini-vacation, you should daydream about being someplace, doing whatever it is that would make you smile and feel happy inside out!
3. If you do not have the time and energy, desire, or slightest interest in doing what is being asked, then you shouldn't.
4. If you have been made to feel no one else can do a better job than you or no one else can do whatever is being asked of you (because you've done it for "x" number of years) then it's time to say no. It's also someone else's turn to learn!
5. It's definitely time to "say no" if you're made to feel guilty for saying no or if you feel guilty all on your own for declining the task.
6. Say "no" when you are not helping the disadvantaged but are helping those who can help themselves, without your assistance.
7. Say "no" when you do not believe in the cause.
8. Say "no" if you do not wish to make a political statement or become involved in a controversial issue.
9. Say "no" to what is asked of you when a loved one has complained about not spending more time with you or when you know you have neglected them.
10. Say "no" to others because you're saying "yes" to yourself. Yes, you will take better care of yourself by eliminating the "busy stuff" from your day and do what you absolutely must!

Will it be easy? No. Can you do it? Yes. Will you? It's up to you. If you need help putting all of it into perspective, ask yourself this question: "If I had six months to live, will I wish I had done what is being asked of me or would it matter?"

Say "Yes" to life savers and "No" to life stealers! As my mother taught me, "No, thank you. I'm sorry," would be the polite way to say it. I am capable of saying this without providing a reason. Do not feel a reason has to be shared. You are merely unable to do what is being asked.

2007 Avis Ward of GeoVi's Home for New Life

Avis Ward is an Orthodontic Management Consultant. More information about Avis can be found here: http://aviswardconsulting.com/ or Avis Ward Avis invites you to view her blog and participate in her forum.

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